When I received an invitation to attend tonight's premiere of Sharknado 5: Global Swarming, in the Mat Franco Theater at The LINQ; I wasn't quite sure what was happening. I remember thinking “They made more than one of those?” Apparently, they’ve made four more, and based on what I witnessed, this evening; there’s no end in sight. Especially in Las Vegas, where – it was announced, immediately following the screening – Caesars Entertainment will be opening a live, interactive Sharknado attraction called (you guessed it) Sharknado: Live; in conjunction with Bernie Yuman's Say Entertainment, Royal Oak Management, Eric Gardner's Panacea Entertainment, and the folks from The Asylum (the producers of the Sharknado franchise, all of whom seem to be named Dave).
But I’m getting ahead of myself, here; so let’s look at Sharknado 5 (as I’m not able to comment on Sharknadoes 1 through 4). Hands-down, the best part of the film was the casting: It was just one hilarious and continuous round of Spot the Cameo; and lemme tell you, they were legion!
In addition to Olivia Newton-John and her daughter, Chloe Lattanzi as ‘Orion’ and ‘Electra’ (a mother-daughter team of surgeons specializing in bionics); Dolph Lundgren as Ian Ziering’s time-travelling son; Cody Linley (Hannah Montana) as Ziering’s older son; and Olympic Gold Medalist Greg Louganis as ‘Zico’ (a Brazilian villain); there was Nichelle Nichols (Star Trek) as the Secretary General of NATO; and Chris Kattan (Saturday Night Live) as the British Prime Minister.
How, you might be wondering, does a director top casting Charo as the Queen of England? Why, by casting Fabio as the Pope, of course!
There were also a plethora of folks from the realm of reality-television, including Tiffany Pollard (the titular star of I Love New York), felonious choreographer Abby Lee Miller (Dance Moms), and Clay Aiken (American Idol); as well as Porsha Williams and Claudia Jordan (Real Housewives of Atlanta).
Meanwhile, appearing as themselves (we assume) were Margaret Cho, Jai Rodriguez, Today’s Kathy Lee Gifford, Hoda Kotb, and Al Roker; Talk Stoop’s Cat Greenleaf, Downtown Julie Brown (wubba-wubba-wubba), Gilbert Gottfried, David Naughton, Tony Hawk, Tom Daley, Brett Michaels, and Samantha “Naughty Girls (Need Love Too)” Foxx.
And while my tone might seem a bit snarky, herein; let me assure you, that (once I suspended any semblance of disbelief) I thoroughly enjoyed myself. Sure, I felt like I was losing IQ points just being in the theater; so this proved a teensy bit difficult, at times. (Lemme give you a fo'instance... How, fo'instance, can they be wearing leather jackets, get sucked into a tornado – shark or otherwise – and suddenly be wearing heavy winter coats?).
However, once I let the meds kick-in, so I could ignore that incessant little voice in my head (the one prodding me to ask where, having just fallen out of a sharknado, on the side of a mountain, they found skis and a snow board, let alone a half-dozen huskies and a dog-sled?!?!); I was able to laugh along with the everybody else. I finally got it: And it was a hoot!
I’m not sure how Sharknado can “jump the shark” (which is probably akin to an auto-fellating Steve Bannon); but if there’s a way, this film franchise can and will do it - with borrowed taglines from various successful theatrically-released films, and a number of tongue-in-cheek sharktastic puns. And you know what? Barring the coming of Sharkageddon, it’ll be sharktacular!
Sharknado 5: Global Swarming
Click HERE for info
Get into it!