When I was little, my father used to tell me “It’s not what you say: It’s how you say it.”  And for the most part, I concur.  But upon viewing the looks that paraded down the red carpet, at last night’s Golden Globes, I think we can rework the expression to fit style, thusly: It’s not what you wear: It’s how you wear it.

There were some who received near-unanimous accolades for their red-carpet looks, last night – including Mandy Moore (in Naeem Khan with jewelry by Neil Lane), Reese Witherspoon (in Atelier Versace and archival Tiffany & Co. jewelry), Zoe Saldana (in Gucci Premiere with Bulgari jewelry), Evan Rachel Wood (channeling Dietrich and Bowie in Altuzarra’s custom tuxedo), Ruth Negga (in a futuristic short-sleeved, silver-sequined, front-zip number from Louis Vuitton with a Fred Leighton X Gemfields cuff featuring 25.50cts of responsibly sourced rubies), Viola Davis (in Michael Kors Collection and Harry Winston), Gina Rodriguez (in Naeem Khan and Chopard), and Kristen Bell (in Jenny Packham with more than 115cts of diamonds from Harry Winston).

There were also some who received near-unanimous jeers for theirs – including Jessica Biel (in an Ellie Saab dress that was simultaneously too much and not enough), Sarah Jessica Parker (in a Vera Wang wedding dress with gloves, and hair that seemed to be Princess Leia by way of Little House on the Prairie), Carrie Underwood (in an Iris Serban dress that brought to mind a cupcake decorated by Georgia O’Keefe…  Flowers = Vaginas.  We get it.), and Sofia Vergara (wearing Zuhair Murad Couture that featured lace, burn-out, metallics, georgette, sequins, and – well, it was a lot going on for a barely-there dress; and the hair was just a miss.  Tip: If you’re gonna channel JLo on the red carpet, bring-out her whole look and not just the dress).

At the end of the day, it’s called “styling” and it’s so much more than just picking out a dress.  It’s coordinating your attitude, your jewelry, your maquillage, your hair, your accessories, your scent, your snacks – everything.

Take a gander at Kathryn Hahn’s look, for instance.  Brandon Maxwell’s three-piece cocktail suit veers toward rocker-chic with its visible bandeau and plunging neckline; and her zhuzhed-up hair (normally seen straight) is the perfect topper to the look.  And while I’m a sucker for some sparkle, she kept it simple, with a few Lorraine Schwartz jewels.  In addition to looking strong and confident, she had an air about her, like she was ruling over the coolest table in the cafeteria (think: fierce, without veering into Regina George territory).

Blake Lively looked stunning, in a custom Atelier Versace gown with pockets and over $7 million worth of jewelry from Lorraine Schwartz, including a pair of exquisite emerald cuffs.  Unfortunately, her usually impeccably styled hubby, Ryan Reynolds was a bit too orange for my liking.

And Thandie Newton slayed, in an off-the-shoulder white Monse gown with a sparkling bronze hem (that she said reminded her of a lit cigarette), with a shit-ton of Harry Winston diamonds (including a bezel-set necklace that she wore as a backlace), and her hair pulled tight, accentuating her exquisite bone structure.  Thank you, Thandie!

There were a lot of beautiful women in beautiful dresses, but unfortunately you have to look at the two together, and sometimes it doesn’t work.  Come back for Part 2, and find out what I’m talking about!

Red Carpet Looks
2017 Golden Globes
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